I haven't updated in months, but there's been a lot of amazing things happening. Bringing God back to the center of my life has really helped me through some dark feelings as well. It's hard to not feel depressed when you're living with family, drive a dying car, and are still drowning financially despite your husband working and you sticking to a tight budget. Life has been HARD. But life has also been amazing. The kids & I have started going to a new church that's only 5 minutes away from the house. And God has really been working in our lives and it seems that those feelings of being "stuck" were from being "stuck" far away from Him. My kids adore going to church every week & to Awana on Wednesday nights. I love church, our pastor, and our church family. I love Wednesday night Bible study, Thursday night praise team practice & getting to fellowship with fellow believers almost daily.
Both girls are in school now, but different schedules, so there's lots of running around, but I usually only have 2 kids to tend from 8-3:30pm now. hehe. Sophie has been in afternoon kindergarten since summer and is THRIVING. She's completed all of her "end of kindergarten goals" before Christmas & is now in some specialized extra learning groups to keep her love of learning going. Her teacher loves her and Sophie has really done well making and maintaining friendships (and a boyfriend named Damian!). I'm so proud of her! Maddy is in a morning preschool program (Head Start) since early January & is growing leaps and bounds already. She is learning independence away from me & didn't cry today when I dropped her off. She's been crying for a few minutes most days, but it's getting shorter and shorter in duration. She is also starting to sing independently and discovering more of her voice. She can write a few letters and knows her phone number now too and is making friends! I was so worried she would have trouble making friends, but she proved me wrong! Way to go Maddy! Her speech is growing too. We've been reading tons and tons of books since starting story time every week (which sadly, Maddy misses due to preschool at the same time now), but slowly Maddy is learning about sentence structure and words are getting easier to understand (mostly). My 4 year old is growing into a little girl now and I am so proud of her!
Noah had a vocabulary EXPLOSION!! He talks SO SO SO much! I swear he talks more then Sophie did at his age. This kid even talks in his sleep sometimes. He finally night weaned and has been sleeping much better at night now too. I'm grateful for that. Now if only he could go to sleep on his own. One thing at a time...one thing at a time. He's potty learning, and is mostly consistent all day (including naps & short car rides), so I'm hoping we're nearing the end of day time diapers for the time being. He might be able to go to Head Start in the fall, so aside from potty training, I am trying to get him used to being watched by someone else without me there. He doesn't mind if I leave him home with Brian when I go to church, but he has a fit if he has to be in the nursery without me for more then 20 minutes. I'm praying we can start a church nursery ministry, so we can have consistent helpers he can get used to instead of switching between me and a friend all of the time. It would be amazing to be able to actually listen to a sermon on Sunday morning as it's being spoken, instead of a recording later or not at all.
Brian still enjoys his job, though they are low on work right now and he's still drastically underpaid. I pray that he either finds a new job or more work will come his way so he won't have to worry about how we will pay our bills, get a different car or finally get ahead. I am faithfully praying for peace in that area & know God will show us the way. I've also been praying that God speaks to Brian's heart and he joins us at church soon. He told me last week that he would like to join us at church on Easter, so that's a start! One step at a time!
I've been busy with making cakes/cupcakes/cake pops for church events, running kids all over the place, and trying to keep on top of the housework, while still eating as healthy as possible and throwing a bit of exercise in every once and a while. I feel spiritually renewed and want my body to feel renewed as well, so I'm hoping to lose weight to become a healthier version of me. And to set a healthier example for my kids. I also want to be able to be the best doula I can be. I haven't been actively seeking out winter births because honestly, I hate the anxiety winter causes me. I hate driving in snow, worrying about weather, finding childcare to watch the kids despite weather...it just stresses me out a whole lot. So, I'm finishing my certification stuff (still need to read that last required reading book!) until it gets warmer so I can find clients again. I also hope to be able to teach childbirth classes in the future as well as become a lactation counselor. It's frustrating that this area has very little in the way of natural birth resources, but perhaps this is a need that I am here to help satisfy. :)
God is working in our lives. Things will continue to change and look up for us. I feel like this year is our year!
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