I'm annoyed with my brother & my best friend.
They've been dating for over a year now & actually live together too. Now they've hit a tough patch in their relationship, so they're thinking about calling it quits. Anyone in a room around them can tell something's going on, so they're not fooling us. The problem is they're both SO much alike & both SOOOOOOO stubborn that they have a hard time seeing the other person's point of view. They have different tastes for things, but their personalities are so similar it really amazes me.
They don't realize that while it takes two people for a relationship to work, it also takes 2 people for that relationship to fail. They both have pretty much given up & are waiting for a fight to be the end. Why not just end it now if they're waiting for that fight? Why is it not worth fighting for? For me, any relationship I've ever been in meant I worked very very hard to make it work no matter what. And I've only thought I've been in love twice (2nd time it was really real, I knew I wasn't really in love w/the 1st person), which made me fight harder to keep it--and I did & I married him! I've only ever entered relationships looking for a lifetime partner, so maybe my views are slightly skewed? They both say they love each other, but if you love like that, then fight for it! You don't want to ever let it go. You give it everything in your soul to keep it.
Some of the things they're fighting about...no, MOST of the things they're fighting about are typical couples fights. Things you worth through TOGETHER and find a compromise. It's not about 1 person being right and 1 person being wrong. It's about finding the balance. And it's ok to admit you're wrong!! Sometimes you really are wrong! Admit it, get over it, & move on! Work hard to understand what that other person's opinion is. If you listen to them--truly listen w/out interrupting or getting overly emotional, you can work out almost everything. Differing opinions, differing tastes can be worked through if you try hard enough.
I make a lot of sacrifices to make my relationship with Brian work, and he does the same. It's about respect & love for the other person to want them to be happy, even if it means you have to do something you don't like doing sometimes. Lord knows I hate video games, but I know Brian enjoys them, so we have them & I don't get pissed w/him for playing them sometimes. He also respects the fact I don't like video games & doesn't play them when I need him or when I want time to myself w/out kiddos. Give & take. Don't be selfish. Be selfless. THINK OF THE OTHER PERSON FIRST SOMETIMES!!! UGH!!
I'm frustrated with what's inevitably gonna happen. They'll have one more fight, break up, she'll move back home to her family & he'll be grumpy for a long while. I won't see her for a long time, phone calls/emails/facebooking will become irregular (especially once Newbie's here & life gets super chaotic) & we'll grow apart. It really bums me out. It makes me even more upset that Sophie's gonna take it the hardest. She LOVES LOVES LOVES her & won't understand why she doesn't come visit anymore. I really wish I never introduced Sophie to her unless I knew for certain she'd be around for the rest of our lives. Ya know? I guess this is something I need to learn from as well. Protect my kids no matter what, even if that means not getting close to potential family members. Whatever I need to do for them, I will do. Just makes me upset. :o(
And if you don't feel like fighting the fight, then give up. Don't drag something on forever if you truly don't want it to work. If you want an out, then have the guts and take it. Sometimes things are not worth working out, but nip it in the bud once you realize it.
So yeah. I'm annoyed...